More thoughts.

Wish List. Updated.

1. I'm running out of lip gloss. :) I never thought I would say that, but truly, my FOUR tubes are running low. I'm ridiculous. I've read that we actually consume most of that stuff...at least mine tastes good. :P

2. A pet duck. I really want a pet duck, so badly it's ridiculous.

3. Picnics down south! Like at the Inarajan pools! That would be so cool!

4. More time to READ! I have so many books on my Books to Be Read pile. Several!

I'm trying.

Today has been absolutely amazing!!! I don't even have words to express how much I've loved today!!! It started off pretty kick-back.

I got to school at ten after 7, like usual. Bought Kaz some fried rice, sat and watched him eat it. Bought a salmon sushi for myself. Ate it with Min Shik. Wanted coffee. Went to the coffee shop and got Hawaiian Coconut. Yum yum yum!!!

Home science was fun! We learned how to sew, thread a needle, tie a knot, and sew even stitches. I...already knew how to do that. So I merrily threaded my needle and sewed my first line of stitches. I was so excited. :D

Hmm. Chem and choir are alright. Ok choir is like TOTALLY fun. I love it! I never want it to end while I'm in it! I have no idea if I'm good at it or not but I LOVE IT!!! What else? Math is going well. I actually have an A! I just checked.

I'm tired of talking about school. I rode the bus today. Riding the bus would be fun if:

1. Your best friend rode the bus

2. You're meeting someone at Skinners

3. If you could walk around without having people stare at you like you were a chicken without a head. Something like that.

I seriously dislike walking through crowds of people from other private schools. Crude boys, snotty girls, disgusting couples. Bleh bleh bleh. I could do without those, thank you.

Oh yeah! In Chem today, all the girls sitting around me had this super long conversation about makeup! It was really funny! Bella just bought the new CoverGirl Lashblast Waterproof Mascara, but she was telling us she didn't like it. And then Chloe told us that she uses the same mascara that Rihanna uses, the Color Blast one or whatever. It was so interesting! And hilarious! We were trading stories about what we use to take off makeup and stuff. Good times. We all wanted to go makeup shopping after that. It DID fit into Chem class. Cosmetology was under the "jobs" part of why it's important to study chemistry!! :D

I can't remember anything else. BUT I TRIED TODAY!

I know. I'm lame.

I haven't blogged in such a long time.

I have nothing to say.

I'm sorry.

One of these days I'm going to make up for all this lost time.

Here's for the girls ;)

This is the first high school girls volleyball game of the season! This is also the first time we have had a VARSITY girls team for volleyball in four years! So the girls have been working hard for this season.

Sanchez always has a good amount of support for their teams, so let's crowd them out and show support for OUR team.

Wear something BLUE or YELLOW! BE CREATIVE!

If you are having trouble with the entry fee ask a friend.

I ripped this off Kyle's facebook.

Read!

I've finished two books in the last week.

The Mysterious Benedict Society.

and The Graveyard Book.

Two very excellent books.

I love books like these because they view life from a different perspective.

Neither are vile or have objectionable materials.

The Graveyard Book sounds scary but is not scary.

It's actually a really sweet story. There are a few "dark" parts, since it's in a cemetery. There are ghosts and a murder in the story, but as far as being gross or explicit, NO. It's fine. :) However, please be sure to make sure it's ok with whoever you need to check with if you read this book. I have no idea who reads this blog, and I just want to be sure I don't get anyone in trouble.

The Mysterious Benedict Society is a little bit cliche and predictable, but the end is very conclusive. It's one of those books that I don't regret reading. It's a good book. I love the plot! It's creative in a expectable way...I don't know if that really made sense. :D

I started another one right now called Here, There Be Dragons. I am not really a "fantasy" book reader and am not really fond of reading about mystical characters, but I love the writing style of the book! I don't know what it is, but it's captivating! I'll tell you more about it later.

My Day.

Today was just one of those days that I really dislike being a girl. :( For those who are not girls, on days like today, you have it so, so easy.

OTHER THAN THAT, I've had a very wonderful and productive day! In Home Science today, I got to make the teriyaki sauce, while most everyone else just had to cut a bunch of veggies! I'm realizing that, contrary to prior beliefs of mine, I do know how to cook. I just don't really know how to make anything off the top of my head. Truly. That's what my problem is, so I'm very proud of myself that I figured it out.

Speaking of being proud of myself, I have a 90 average in math class!! And I got a 96 on my math test!! I haven't gotten an A on a math test since I was in 8th grade! Soooooo happy! One of four As in the class too! I can brag...:) My blog. Besides, you're probably not even in my math class. :P

Oh yeah, have you ever stuck your head out of a window of a moving vehicle? I LOVE doing that! Especially when it's raining. It's like a rain shiatsu for your head! :D Haha...and it's super refreshing. I love it. Try it sometime...when it's SAFE! And if you do this UNSAFELY, you sure didn't hear it from me!

My hands are dry. I'm going to put to good use cocoa butter lotion. :)

RANDOM STORY:

One time in PE last year, we were doing a stretch that looked like we were bowing down and praying towards Mecca or bowing down to an idol. Well, whatever...we were prostrate on the floor, so I made a joke and pretended like I was worshipping a fake idol. But then I felt guilty like I was sinning, so I prayed and asked forgiveness from God in front of my whole class. It was so funny and not funny at the same time. Good times. :D Yes, I am awesome.

Quick.

I haven't been up to much. :)

Uhhhh, I just finished reading The Mysterious Benedict Society. Excellent book. Almost made me cry, but not quite...

Ehh. Sorry I haven't got much time to say anything!

Oh YEAH! First girls' vball game this Friday at the FLC at 5:30pm!!

Be there!

:D

I tried. :)

This is me being bored in my room and attempting to take before and after pictures of my haircut. FAIL. I got too distracted making faces. I thought they were funny and put them up anyway. Obviously, I had my hair cut again, and I was secretly very proud because the lady who cut my hair kept commenting about how healthy, shiny, and strong it is. :D 

RANDOM! I just took a little quiz on Facebook about what my eyes say about me or whatever. They are fun. :) This is what I got.

Beauty.

When people look into your eyes, they see true beauty. They can tell that you're a down-to-earth, and honest person. Your eyes make people want to get to know you. You make friends easily and aren't afraid to speak your mind, but you always make sure to be kind and polite. If you don't like something, you let people down in a subtle way. You like to make yourself known, without going overboard. You are a gifted person that has inside and outside beauty, and you always like to flaunt it!

Dear blog,

It's been a rough day, in ways. I'm realizing that when things don't go my way or I'm disappointed, I get really grumpy. This is me not trusting God. Here we go again...

Hi, my name is Ruthie.

I'm not perfect. 

My heart breaks.

I have a really deep trust problem.

Most people think that I'm open to others and open to getting myself vulnerable.

They're right. To an extent.

I am open to people.

I purposely open up myself to them.

Why?

I want them to open up to me.

Some people can't do that, because they don't trust people.

I trust people.

But you see, that's my problem.

I trust people.

Who do I really need to be trusting?

GOD.PERIOD

Deep down, I would love to stop being disappointed. 

No, not just by other people.

But mainly disappointed with myself. 

I set my expectations far too high.

Today, after crying for a long while, I quit.

I quit expecting things from myself that I don't have.

I quit thinking I'm perfect.

I quit thinking I've got everything together.

I quit thinking I don't need help.

I quit thinking I can do this by myself. 

Truth is:

I'm not perfect.

I haven't got everything together.

I do need help.

I can't do this by myself. 

I put my desires and expectations in the hands of a loving Father that has known all these truths about me all this time. He's just been waiting for me to come to this point of realization. I need to trust God. It sounds so simple, so elementary. But it's foundational. If I don't trust God, all the things I know about Him are just that: things I know about Him; facts. 

"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding." Proverbs 3:5 (emphasis mine)

From my heart to yours,

Ruthie

What I really want.

Time.

I want time.

This is totally irrelevant to the title. I just didn't want to make two short updates.

I'm beginning to realize what "to each his own" means in a new sense. I don't want to take the time to explain why or how, but I think every boy has his "best girl in the world." She may or may not really be the best girl in the world, but to him, she probably is. I stumbled on the sweetest little present at school today. A girl I know has a backpack with little symbols and words written on the outside, and on the inside, was written the meanings and significance of each word or symbol. It was adorable. Sentimental. Very sentimental. That takes thought. :) I appreciate people who give presents like that. 

Lame lame lame.

I'm sorry that my blog has been somewhat abandoned these last two days. School's been going great, I guess. It's an adjustment.

Shout out.

I had a really good afternoon. :)

Hmm, I just have many abstract thoughts right now. 

My math class is a riot. It really is. We are so mathematically challenged. I am one of them, but I'm one of the more vocal mathematically challenged students. Our teacher asked us how many problems two sets of #4-28, only multiples of four is. It took us a long while to figure out we only had 14 problems to do for homework. It was pretty ridiculous. We have to keep asking the teacher to repeat what he just said. I really think he should stop teaching us consumers math and go back to the fundamentals of math. We struggle so much. I pity our class, our teacher, and myself. It's bad...it makes me want to cry because I am so bad at math. It's not funny...

I love my English class. Even though I have it at eighth hour, my teacher is AMAZING! She is so captivating and interesting! I could just sit there talking about why we study English for the whole day! I loved it! And research too...since I have the same teacher. :D

It's cute. I have two repeat teachers. I have Miss Choi for first hour and sixth hour, and I have Miss French third hour and eighth hour, on Tuesdays and Thursdays only.

I'm going to sleep. I'm really tired. Oh yeah, I mentioned my blog in the letter I had to write in research today. :D 

Last Day of Summer.

Tomorrow I start the first day of my junior year of high school. In some respect, I am excited, but in another, I really don't care. Ok, not that I don't care...it's just that this is my 14th first day of school at Harvest. I know all of the teachers there. I have like one or two new classmates; all the others I've known for most of my life. I was at Harvest pretty much my whole summer.

Tomorrow is just another day at Harvest; only, it's a different set of clothes. Seriously.

Anyway, I don't really have much to say to conclude my thoughts about this summer. It started off with a whole lot of emotions, hard to deal with emotions. The end of it all? Anticipation. 

I'd really love to see how this year turns out. By far, it has been the most surprising and unsuspecting. 

Mobile Updates!

I'm on Mom's Blackberry right now. Just chillin' at another Sustantia event. I have come to the conclusion that my mother is downright amazing. I am so proud of her and what she's accomplished. She is such an abitious and determined woman. She deserves the honor she has. I'm so proud to be her daughter. This thing also has some connection to a Rice Festival that's on-island. I would love to go there with a bunch of friends! It'll be here in Agana Shopping Center until sometime in September, so if anyone wants to plan a Saturday to the exhibit, then I'm down. ;)

Book List.

BBC believes most people will have only read 6 of the 100 books here. How do your reading habits stack up?

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen -X 
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien- X
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte - X
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling - X
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee - X
6 The Bible -X
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte - X
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell - 
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman - 
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens - X 

Sub-total: 8 (Ok, I already disproved BBC's theory.)

11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott - X
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy- 
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller -
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare - X
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier -
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien - X
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk - 
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger - 
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger-
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot-

Sub-total: 3
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell -
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald- 
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens-
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy-
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams-
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh-
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky - 
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck - 
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll- X
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame -X

Sub-total: 2

31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy- 
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens-
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis -X
34 Emma-Jane Austen - X
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen-X
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - C.S. Lewis -X
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hossein - 
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres - 
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Goldenx -
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne - X

Sub-total: 5

41 Animal Farm - George Orwell - 
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown - 
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez - 
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving -
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins - 
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery -
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy- 
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood- 
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding - 
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan- 

Sub-total: 0

51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel - 
52 Dune - Frank Herbert - 
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen - X 
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth - 
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon-
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens - 
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley - 
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night - Mark Haddon- 
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez-

Sub-total: 1

61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck -
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov - 
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt- 
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold- 
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas - X
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac - 
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy-
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding-
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie- 
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville- X

Sub-total: 2

71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens - X
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker - 
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett- X
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson - 
75 Ulysses - James Joyce - 
76 The Inferno – Dante - 
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome - 
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackery -

Sub-total: 2

80 Possession - AS Byatt-
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens - X
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell - 
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker- 
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro - 
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert - 
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White - X
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom-X
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle - X
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton - 

Sub-total: 4

91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad -
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery - X
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks 
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams - 
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole -
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute - 
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas -X
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare -X
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl -X
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo - X

Subtotal: 5
Total: 31

This is ridiculous.

I've been reading through my blog posts from the past couple of days, and I sound really stupid. I sound air-headed and girly, and so not like myself. Whatever. It's not like blog posts define who I am. 

It's the last Friday of summer. I think I owe myself a few thought provoking words. 

This summer was really hard, not only on myself, but on so many people I know. It's difficult when people you love move away. There has been a lot of healing this summer. I think back to the day during Cool School that our whole team just did one-on-ones and talked, for real. It hurts, but it's what's good for us. Honesty. Ok, that wasn't as thought-provoking as I hoped.

Tonight, I was faced with some facts that I don't really know how to deal with. I like to think that I really know myself and that I know exactly who I am. I do, it's just that, I'm beginning to realize that I have so much suppressed feelings in my subconscious that I don't know how to let out. No, I'm not crazy. I think every human being is like this. We learn to deal with things. We tuck away our hurts so we no longer feel them. They are no longer part of us. We are wrong. They are part of us. We are just not aware of its presence. The hurt has made it's way deeper than we know. We shouldn't hide it away, we need to find a way to channel it out. I want to let it all out. I don't want to hurt for the rest of my life.

I want the darkness out, so that there may be room for the light. 

School.

This is the last Friday night that I have before school starts. I don't really know what to say about it. I just came home from orientation like an hour ago. This year is going to be different. I can feel it. There's just this distance-y feeling that I'm getting. It feels funny being with people that are really my age. 

Well, whatever. I'll learn to deal with it.

OH yeah, for my third year of high school, I get another dumb locker.

*sigh*

We'll see.

Hmm.

Where to begin? I have had such an exhausting day today. 

I helped out at Harvest today, specifically Mrs. Loker. Sweet fun. I love her. :) I don't really know what else to say. 

Honestly, I'm really tired. When I do feel suddenly inspired, I'll say something. I promise. I have a headache and I am just..tired. D:

Number 1 reasons.

I was thinking about these today.

Top number one reason:

Why I like country music:

It's more than just a song. It's a story.

I occasionally like staying at home:

Mom and Dad's faces when they see the house I cleaned.

I think ice cream is heavenly:

Definition of wallowing: to eat ice cream while getting over boys. 

Hah! More like getting over anything. 

I love about my Mac:

It's in to minimalism. It's simple. It's sleek. 

Girls watch chick-flicks:

We imagine we're the girl in the movie, being saved by her man. 

Subconsciously and unintentionally, but it's true.

Why I like to blog:

It's nice knowing people actually enjoy what I have to say. I like writing to an audience.

This summer has been the best I've ever had:

Simple. I've learned to wait and to be patient. 

3 months.

I've been waiting my whole summer to feel the way I do right now. And let me tell you, it's been totally worth it.

And to top that all off, 

I'm going to hang out with my best friend today. :) 

God is good. He brings healing from brokenness. 

On another note, I found a SUPER cute bag. It's reversible! On one side, it's white and pink with tons of little flowers, and the other side is grey! I love it! I also found some cute shoes at Ross yesterday. I'm actually trying to wear them in right now, so they're comfier to wear before school starts. I'm excited. I got new uniforms yesterday. I was able to find navy blue skirts with the pleats! I love them! They need to be hemmed since Harvest uniforms come ridiculously long. I was supposed to do that today, but I don't really know where any of the stuff to do that is. :( I'm going to sport the vibrant red shirts. The faded blue made me look super washed out. 

I'm going to clean the house right now. :) 

I dig this song. Happy Ending by Sugarland.

Cowboys ride into sunsets
The good guy always gets the girl
Cinderella has just fit
A glass slipper that changed her world

We all know the stories
We all know the fairy tales
We all get the glory of making it for ourselves

From the beginning
We're all looking for a happy ending
Every dream of winning
Every love we've been in
Right from the beginning
We're looking for a happy ending

We've come here with nothing
And take it with us the day we leave
The first and last breath don't matter
It's all the ones that are in-between
It's the reason for living
It's the reason the caged bird sings
It's why we see it in the movies
All the way to the closing scenes

From the beginning
We're all looking for a happy ending
Every dream of winning
Every love we've been in
Right from the beginning
We're looking for a happy ending

And all those dreamers who have come and gone
Who've reached for the stars, who've overcome
You're the hope, you're the wish, you're the truth
Baby, here's the proof

Baby's born in this ghetto
Baby's born with a silver spoon
One tells his Mama I have a dream
One tells his Mama I'll walk the moon

From the beginning
We're all looking for a happy ending
Every dream of winning
Every love we've been in
Right from the beginning
We're looking for

From the beginning
We're all looking for a happy ending
Every dream of winning
Every love we've been in
Right from the beginning
We're looking for a happy ending

I think not!

I can do something that's been said to be impossible. I put mascara on without opening my mouth!!! Hah!! I'm so proud of myself. Totally random and girly, I know. 

I'm going to buy a few school supplies tonight. :) Excited.

I love new school supplies. 

Interruption. :)

I'm doing some chores around the house right now, and usually when I do, I think a lot. These are some of the thoughts that have been rolling around in my mind. They're more serious than the last few times I've done this. :) But hey, I think it's good stuff.

Why is it that most people who come to a profound realization of what "knowing God" really means are people who have grown up in the church? Does that make sense? I think I might know. At least, what I do know holds true for my understanding of what knowing God means. I think for people who have grown up in the church, we get so used to hearing about God that eventually (sometimes also unintentionally) we get desensitized to the awesomeness (real def of awesome) of our great God. We get to know facts about God, rather than God Himself. 

Then. When it finally clicks, it's HUGE. I know. It changed my life. Your relationship with God steps from a head knowledge to a heart knowledge. The reality of who He is has moved the eighteen inches from your head to your heart. Those eighteen inches are a big deal. 

Just a thought. :) And I did check up on the whole eighteen inches thing. You think I make these things up? 

Solved.

I know what I learned this summer. I know it so well that I can say it in a sentence. I barely even need to explain it.

I've learned what it means to be strong.

Be strong for other people.

Be strong for myself. 

Something like that.

Kaz's 6th birthday party!

So I had so much fun tonight!! I love parties at our house. They are ridiculously awesome. Here are some pics. And yes, we do still have some of our Christmas decorations up. :) We're festive like that. No, just busy. :) And the pics uploaded inverted. Oh well. Just scroll down and then scroll up. :D The quality of the pics is kind of blurry and pixely. I can't figure out why. I'm too lazy to fix it. Whatever. I'll fix it when I have time. Or...when I'm not lazy. 

Ok.

So now I'm completely curious who reads my blogs. For real. I get on average about 6 or 7 visits every day, but I only know who 2 or 3 of them are. I just read an anonymous comment from somebody, but I have no idea who it is! Now I'm just curious. 

Yard work.

So this afternoon, I was able to help Dad out with the yard. Not my total favorite thing to do, but Dad needed help, and I couldn't say no. :) Besides Dad gets really excited when I do the job well, and that's a good feeling, because I know he's proud. It was nice.

Anyway, I was raking the leaves from our mango tree. I was originally wearing a pair of shorts, but then I changed into jeans because I was getting bit by so many mosquitoes! My jeans are way too loose on me. Ok, that's not completely a bad thing, but I lost like 10 pounds since I came back from my trip to the States. I wonder if I'm getting taller too. That'd be nice. :) ANYWAY, I got bitten up soooo bad!! I'm not itchy right now though. I think it's because I'm not thinking about it. Ok, now I'm totally thinking about it...never mind!

Then I had to rake up the grass that Dad cut. I started with the front yard. Easy. Then I did the sides. Alright. Then I got to the back...then Dad said I needed to take a break. He was still working on cutting up the grass in the back, and I think I was in the way. I went inside to my room to just hang out for a while. I get on my laptop to do a few things and I lied down...and totally fell asleep!! 

I woke up two hours later to a phone call. After the phone call, I walked out of my room and saw Dad. He looked at me and shook his head and said jokingly, "Next time, I'm not letting you go on break." We laughed. But I still felt kind of bad...:( 

Oh well. I guess I've been doing so much of nothing that even the slightest physical activity gets me tired. D: I'm gonna fall asleep so much during school! I can feel it already! 

D: I dig this abstract thought blogging thing.

I am currently eating fried chicken. Mom cooked it without oil or water, so it was fried in its own oil! Blehh! Actually, that's less gross than cooking it in more oil than it already has. The chicken itself is pretty good. :) The meat falls off the bones..it's kind of messy, but it's fun to pick at food on a huge, very plain white plate. That's how I'm eating it. And I'm drinking a glass of water. Ok, so maybe I'm intentionally making my lunch pathetic. :) Whatever. I just had a mondo huge coffee cake. Dessert first. Definitely.

Randomly, I'm listening to a playlist that Zooey Deschanel put together. Totally songs I dig. I haven't heard the whole thing yet, but so far so good. :) It's totally old school. Sounds like stuff I grew up listening to. :) I really want to watch 500 Days of Summer. 

Thoughts that have been floating around in my head.

1. I don't like when girls who are light complected wear black eyeliner, especially when they have neither black nor dark brown hair. That really bothers me. I don't even wear black eyeliner. I wear dark brown. :) Actually, I just checked and technically it's "Brownish black." Wear eyeliner that matches your hair color, skin tone, and eye color, please. And just so everyone knows, nobody I come in contact with or am close to does this, so please do not feel like I'm indirectly telling you your make-up is tacky. I just saw this a lot while I was in the States, and it made me feel sick. 

2. You know what, that counts for all kinds of make-up, specifically lip color. Like for me, if I wore pink or red lip gloss, it would NOT match. I wear shades of brown or clear. Ok, the whole matching skin tone, eye color and hair color thing counts for everything you put on yourself. It bothers me when people wear clothes that don't match. For example, I don't wear reds, oranges or yellows. They look horrible on me. 

Here. Let me just tell you guys. 

I'm a Winter. I wear jewel colors (emerald, royal blue, royal purple). Colors like that. You know, the deeper shades. How am I a winter? I have olive-ish colored skin. I have really dark hair and dark colored eyes. Fun, huh? :D I don't remember why I was thinking about this. Oh yeah, it really bothers me when people don't wear their color or when girls don't wear make up that matches. D: 

3. You're not supposed to wear black and brown together. Or black and navy blue. That's a no-no. This bothers me too. Or when people wear too many bright colors or too many patterns at once. Learn to embrace neutrals. :) There are things called accessories. Those are supposed to make your outfit pop. Duhhh.

4. Enough of that. :) I love the smell of leather.

5. I think my favorite stores that we don't have on Guam are Bath and Body Works and Old Navy. Most of my clothes are from Old Navy. And I just smell like Bath and Body Works products. :) Like pretty much all the time. Wild Honeysuckle. :) Or random lip gloss from there. Hah!! The girls at camp always made jokes that I talked about Bath and Body Works all the time. I guess I'm just weird like that.

6. I cleaned my room today, like deep cleaning. And you know what took me the longest to do after dusting my books? Dusting my trophies. That sounds totally proud I know, but whose blog is this again? Oh yeah, that's right. MINE. It takes too long to clean trophies. D: I'm too lazy.

7. I don't really like to listen to girl country singers. They sound so whiny. Not their voice. Their songs. I only like specific songs. I was thinking about this today. :)

8. Someone please tell me the point of old security guards? How are they supposed to protect the place when they are old and look like they are going to fall apart? That sounds mean...

9. Why do little children wear shirts with profanity on it? I don't understand that either.

10. I don't like eggs. I really don't. But I seriously love how they taste. I wish I could explain that, but that's a Ruthie thing. :) 

11. A replica of Van Gogh's Roses hangs in my room against my light brown walls. I like his Sunflowers better. :) But that hangs in the hall, because the walls are yellow in the hall. :(

I like doing things like this (what I'm going to do next).

Hi, my name is Ruthie. I love how it's been raining on and off for the past couple of weeks. I don't care that the sun hasn't been out for awhile. I like getting dirty, like muddy and sweaty, but I hate dirty hair. I love the smell of cocoa butter. I never wear sunscreen; I don't feel like I need to. I've gotten sunburned like three times in my life, and all three times were this summer. Sometimes when I have a lot of thinking to do, I either climb the mango tree on Harvest's campus or sit on top of my roof. There's just something appealing to me about being above everything else. It's symbolic of being "above" my circumstances. I like to hide things in random places. I used to write notes on Post-Its and leave them in library books I would borrow. I don't know what else to say. :D

 Pretty, innit?

My cutesy, cozy day.

It's 10:34 in the morning on this overcast Wednesday. Roughly. It'll probably change times when I finally post this. :) I'm sitting in my room. The a/c is turned to 25 degrees Celsius. I never turn it up that high. It's usually at 20-22. 

But, baby, it's cold outside.

It's raining like there's no tomorrow.

I feel like it's Christmas. 

It's so cozy. 

In a few minutes, after this post is up, I'm going to crawl into my bed and take a nap.

I'm listening to songs from my favorite Christmas album ever. (other than my Bing Crosby one)

Relient K's Let it snow baby. Let it reindeer.

Do you get it? Ain't it cute? 

I ate at this coffee shop called The Brown Bag Cafe this morning. I had French toast and a mocha. Super good. I totally recommend it. :) Take me there, ok? Hah. I'd love you forever.

I'm gonna make it big.

Today I was told of something totally random, but it's something I would LOVE to do. I want to do it really badly, but I don't know how since I don't have my own recording equipment. Maybe I do. Maybe I have some sweet program on my Macbook. I don't know. I think I'm going to look into that. 

It's this thing called LibriVox. Mrs. Loker told me about it today. It's this place where you can listen to pieces of literature in the public domain. On its website it says that it is, "Acoustical liberation of books in the public domain." Basically, the public domain would be anything published before 1923. Well, you can volunteer to read pieces of work and send it in.

Mrs. Loker told me that she listened to The Count of Monte Cristo on LibriVox, and for a couple of the chapters she had to listen to, the person reading was terrible! And that would be where my dramatic reading skills (hey! Like I've said before, this is my blog. I can brag about me if I wanted. It's your decision to keep reading. Duhhh.) come in! I could totally volunteer and reread the chapters! Or something cool like that.

I'm excited. I would LOVE to volunteer to read for audio books. That's so me. :D

Life ain't always beautiful.

There. This pretty much sums up most of how I've been feeling this summer. Not in a depressing way, just a learning way. It's not bad. I look back and I'm thankful. :D

Life ain't always beautiful
Sometimes it's just plain hard
Life can knock you down, it can break your heart

Life ain't always beautiful
You think you're on your way
And it's just a dead end road at the end of the day

But the struggle makes you stronger
And the changes make you wise
And happiness has it's own way of takin' it sweet time

[chorus]
No,life aint always beautiful
Tears will fall sometimes
Life aint always beautiful
But it's a beautiful ride

Life aint always beautiful
Some days I miss your smile
I get tired of walkin' all these lonely miles

And I wish for just one minute
I could see your pretty face
Guess I can dream, but life dont work that way

But the struggles makes me stronger
And the changes make me wise
And happiness has it's own way of takin' its sweet time

No, life aint always beautiful
But I know I'll be fine
Hey, life aint always beautiful
But its a beautiful ride
What a beautiful ride

It's raining.

The weather lately makes me so happy. I love to make a cup of tea and just sit out in our garage watching the rain. It's beautiful. 

Why is the rain so attractive?

You know, if anything, I'm really thankful that God makes wonderful things like that for us to enjoy. I'm thankful that He gives us a taste for beauty. I'm thankful that through the beautiful things we see, we see pictures of Him. Pictures of grace. Pictures of love.

You guys remember Passenger Seat? I do. 

Welcome to the world of Stephen Speaks. 

Been listening to him on and off today. 

I love slow, acoustic-y, cutesy songs. 

Every once in awhile. Not always. Not all the time.

Just when I'm in the mood. :D

Anyway, I'm reading through old quotes I used to like. Read and laugh. :)

Enjoy!

If I had the chance to write my own life story, I hope you wouldn't be surprised if your name came up a million times.

Our teacher told us to highlight anything we want, so I went up and marked you with my highlighter. (These are so funny. Did you catch the wordplay?)

I'm the kind of person that laughs at a joke three times. Once when it's told. Once when it's explained to me. Once five minutes later when I finally get it. (This is very true of me)

Never be afraid to try. Remember. Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

Ok, so when I was in 8th grade, I used to hate volleyball. It changed everybody I knew. Now? After 10th grade, I absolutely love it. It changed everything I know. :D That's all. 

Schedule!!!

So. I'm in Miss Choi's homeroom. That's exciting. 

My homeroom is in the FLC. More exciting. 

I have Home Science for first hour, in the FLC, I'm assuming. With Miss Choi!! :D

And Chemistry for 2nd with Mr. Kannon. 

THEN!

I have Choir on MWF and Research on TTH with Mr. Inafuku and Miss French. 

Consumers Math for fourth hour with Mr. Shevy. 

Then I have LUNCH! Very important.

And Life Skills for 6th hour.

US History with Mr. Tipton.

And...English class!!!!! with Miss French at 8th hour.

I'm so happy. English at 8th, that's the best time to have English class.

And I think this year is going to be easier than I expected.

Maybe not quite EASY, just EASIER. :)

More thinking.

When I stay home all day, I tend to get stuck in a thinky mood.

I did grow up this summer. Actually, I grew up a lot. 

I've changed. I can feel it. When I hang out with friends like I normally do, I feel different.

Like, I am no longer the girl I was once. 

That sounds totally bad.

But it's not. 

Totally and completely not.

How? 

I don't know for sure. But I just have this deeper understanding of things.

What things?

Not too sure about that either. 

Maybe life in general?

Yeah, maybe that. 

Maybe.

When I look at people, they are no longer just people to me. They are stories. They are regrets. They are memories. They are what they are made of. 

Does that make sense?

I think maybe just to me. 

But I don't look at people the way I used to, with this faraway apathy, where I do want to get to know them, but I don't want to put the effort into tying heartstrings. 

Now I do. 

I don't think there's really anything on this level of life that I want more than to know people. Know what makes their hearts beat and break. Know what makes them happy. Know what they want in life. Know what they dream about when they sleep. Know what life means to them, who God is to them, things like that. 

I'm listening to Take Me There by Rascal Flatts. 

That's kind of what I mean, but not in a romantic way.

Take me there.

I want to know. I do. I really do. There is nothing more that I would love to do. I've already said that. :) But really. I want to hurt with people. I want to be happy with them. I want to walk life with people. 

I hope this makes sense, in a not-creepy way.

Oh, just for kicks, here's another one to follow-up on my last blog.

I don't understand how girls can grow up and not want a family. That's not me. I would love to grow up and do just that. I don't see anything more fulfilling than getting married and raising your kids to love Jesus. I would love to. That's so cool. That's what I mean by volunteering information. Oh yeah, here's another one. I answer for people. Somebody is talking to the person next to me, but I know the answer. I will totally answer the question, even though I wasn't even the one being talked to. Ok, I'm gonna go now. :) Before I write my whole autobiography. :D Hah!

Hmm.

Do you ever like come up with weird things sometimes when you think about things? I do. Duh, I do. Like here's one.

I want to be buried by the ocean. I do. I do. 

Not in a scary, morbid way, but in a way, this is what I want way.

What you want.

So. I'm being weird, and I'm listening to the song What You Want from the Legally Blonde musical. I know all the words. :) I can't stop laughing. 

Anyway. You know what I want?

I want to start school already! :) I kind of miss it, honestly. I miss the routine.

You know. Waking up at 6. Getting ready for school. Picking out socks and shoes to match. The 15 minutes in the car it takes to get to school. Sitting in the cafeteria until 8. Walking through halls. Switching classes. Watching the clock till lunch. Ohhh, I miss it. I do, I do. I'm getting really excited. I think summer is just long enough for me to miss school.

Hah! The Jamaican part is playing right now!!! :) Good stuff. 

Ohhhh I miss this too. 

Oh you know what else I'm doing right now? Well, I was tending to my virtual farm. I have a cute little pig. It just rolls around in the grass. I'm growing potatoes and grapes. And I have a tree. It's precious. I know. I'm so...boring. :D

But it's RAINING right now!! It's peaceful. I love sitting in my room when it's raining. :) 

I had never heard this part of the song before today, but I like it. 

How about love?
Have you ever been in love?
Cause if you have, you'll know
That love never accepts a defeat
No challenge it can't meet
No place it cannot go
Don't say no to a woman in love