Better.

Well, at least I've come to realize why this summer has been quite difficult for me. At least I've been able to pinpoint why I feel the way I do.

This summer all my initial expectations were shot down and people I love were stripped away. God took away things that I had depended on, put my trust in, and loved. He wanted me to focus on our relationship. He wanted me to grow, learn, and lean on Him. He took away people I could have leaned on for support, for love, for acceptance, for happiness.

At least I know why now. I am doing a lot better. I still just want to cry. I don't know why this is so hard...because really, it isn't. Maybe that's circumstantial happiness.

"May I never lose the wonder, the wonder of the cross. May I see it like the first time, standing as a sinner lost."